Ra'anana Community Kollel

Reunited at Last!

Rabbi Dovid Horwitz

In this week’s parshah we read about the emotionally charged reunion of Ya’akov and his long, lost son Yosef. After twenty-two long years of separation, Yosef falls upon his father with tears of joy. The fact that the Torah fails to mention that Ya’akov also cried over this reunion leads the Midrash to conclude that only Yosef cried when embracing his father. However, Ya'akov did not cry as he decided to recite the Kriyat Shema at that very moment and was therefore deep in concentration. There are many interpretations rendered as to why Ya’akov recited the Shema at this precise moment. One approach is that although it was not the time of day to fulfill this mitzvah, for if so Yosef would have also recited it, Ya’akov recited the Shema as an expression of his gratitude to Hashem for reuniting him with his son.

Although the Gemara (Brachot 58b) does not cite this week’s parshah as its source, the Sages instructed that a person must make the blessing of Shehecheyanu as an expression of his gratitude when seeing a loved one for the first time in thirty days. Similarly, an even more intense blessing of Baruch Mechayei Maytim (Blessed is the One who restores the dead) is recited upon seeing a loved one who one has not seen for an entire year. Interestingly, the reason for this seemingly strange blessing is that if one had not seen a friend for at least a year, then surely Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur had passed since their last meeting. This blessing bears testimony to the kindness that Hashem judged this person for life and not for death, which is in effect equivalent to restoring the dead.

The Poskim write that this blessing of Baruch Mechayei Maytim is only recited if one had no recollection for twelve full months whether or not the person was still living. If, however, they had corresponded through letters or by telephone, one would not recite this blessing even if one hadn’t visually seen the friend in over a year. According to some Poskim, the blessing of Shehecheyanu is recited if thirty days transpired without seeing each other, even if they corresponded within that time, since the blessing is warranted due to the joy one experiences when visually seeing one’s friend. Others are of the opinion that the correspondence lessens the joy of seeing each other again and thus the blessing of Shehechiyanu would not be recited.

The contemporary Poskim write that nowadays most people do not recite either of these blessings since it is unclear exactly how much joy one must experience in order to warrant their recitation. Nevertheless, one who feels a particularly intense joy upon seeing a loved one, such as a parent who is reunited with a child after a long period of separation, should definitely make a blessing of Shehecheyanu. By doing so, we are mimicking the ways of Ya’akov our forefather who in his most joyful moments, directed his love and heartfelt gratitude towards the One above.